It’s Not Easy Being Green

For Kermit it’s the angst of being green. For me, it’s being a ‘Simon Cowell’ in a ‘Paula Abdul’ world.

Out of the 3 judges on AI Simon is the only one who is consistently honest and accurate with his thoughts on the performers. Sure, sometimes he’s just mean when the producers have told him to jazz it up a bit or when he’s jonesing for nicotine and forgot to put on a patch before air time but most of the time he tells people what they really need to hear.

Anyway, as I relate to people I’m realizing I’m much more a Simon than I am a Paula and the world is mostly geared for Paulas. When people are talking about life, their problems, their ISSUES, or what they’re up to as a human being, they seem to want a panel of Paulas. Why is that? (Incidentally, I don’t mean the “drugged up, completely stoned Paula”, I mean the “sugar sweet, I can find something good to say no matter how bad you sucked Paula”).

I won’t even talk about Paula being wrong, which she usually is, it’s really not about that. It’s about honesty becoming devalued in favour of self-esteem building. When I go to the doctor I want a Simon, not a Paula, same if I go to the mechanic. On the show, in case you’re one of the two people in North America who haven’t seen it or one of the many in Papa New Guineau who haven’t and you’ve struggled your way to an internet connection just to catch up on my blogging, everyone ‘boos’ Simon’s criticism while I sometimes watch from home thinking, “Do these people have no friends? Does no one care about these people that they let them go on t.v. to sing this way?”

What do you do when you realize you’re basically a Simon and your occupation brings people to you that would really like a little Paula please?

Incidentally, I have no ‘inner Paula’. If I do, my inner Simon has long ago duct taped her butt to the chair and her mouth shut. I like Simon. I appreciate Simon. Mind you, he’d rip my blog apart…


About brianmpei

Stumbling towards what comes next.
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3 Responses to It’s Not Easy Being Green

  1. nakedpastor says:

    i say amen to all that. i like simon too, his honesty.

  2. Michelle says:

    You’re hilarious. Personally, I think it’s irresponsible having Paula on the panel. She’s in rough shape a lot of the time. And I honestly do prefer Simon’s style. I lose respect for people (family, friends, counselors, etc.) when they enable me or each other instead of confronting the truth. But, I can be a very harsh critic of myself and others and that’s something I’m working on. There should be a little balance. Maybe we should all be like Randy. He’s very middle of the road.

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