Happy Birthday Brad!!!

Today is my little brother Brad’s birthday. Even thought it seems like he was actually born bigger than me it was only yesterday when I was torturing him at home and in the backseat of mom & dad’s car. We would sit together in the back on trips and we would each have our ‘zone’ with a dmz clearly marked between us by seams in the cloth or vinyl seat. I would launch an unprovoked sneak attack and then yell bloody murder when he retaliated and I made sure mom caught him with his arm clearly across the dmz. The torture didn’t stop there.

Once, he and I were at a neighbour’s together visiting his friend, Kevin. They had just taken carpet out of one room of the house to replace it with something new. We came up with the Harry Houdini game. We rolled up his friend in the carpet so that only his head stuck out of the roll. Then we told him we were going to leave him stuck there and go find the neighbourhood Collie to come pee on his uncovered head. (I’m sure this was my idea and not Brad’s.) After he screamed, cried and possibly wet himself, we came back from around the corner of the house. Somehow I managed to talk Brad into trying it. “I won’t leave you, I promise…” Once we had him rolled up, Kevin was only too happy to walk off with me and leave him squirming. After we came back I had to prove my toughness and let them roll me up. I threatened Brad with terrible, frightening, things if he left me there.

He left me there.

I screamed words I’d only read in Playboy. I threatened. I pleaded. I cried. I begged. Nothing. To this day I think they walked around the corner like we had before but this time they were distracted by something and walked further and started playing and completely forgot me. At least that’s what I told my therapist. Finally, Brad reappeared and unrolled me, freeing me from the carpet cocoon. To this day I have paralyzing claustrophobia and I prefer wood floors to carpet. I was too traumatized to get revenge and I’ve respected my handsome, clever, little brother ever since.

I love my brother. He got all the sensitive genes. And even though he’s always been my parent’s favourite, we’ve had some great times together, once I finally started growing up. His generosity is immense and he and his wife Jenn make a perfect couple and perfect uncle and aunt to my kidlings.

Happy Birthday Brad!


About brianmpei

Stumbling towards what comes next.
This entry was posted in Life, Meaning, Reflective. Bookmark the permalink.

8 Responses to Happy Birthday Brad!!!

  1. Nancy Metzger says:

    Dad and I thought we were clever and smart enough we had you fooled. We didn’t think you would ever figure out that we had a favorite.

    As for the car trips, well I guess you got paid by when you had three children of your own. How did you divide the back seat up into thirds?

    Keep writing, I’m reading things concerning your youth I had never dreamed you had done. I always thought you were the perfect child.

  2. brianmpei says:

    Pay no attention to my blogs. I WAS the perfect child.

  3. Brad says:

    OK, Ok, My memories aren’t as clear as yours, and now I see why. The money on the therapist is not a waste! ;P Thanks for the kind words bro. I know I got your your way some times, but that was because I thought you were pretty cool and wanted to hang out with you (still do). Anyway, enough of this love fest, please keep up the writing. I look forward to each post……no really I do! Give everyone hugs from me and Jen. Nathan, hug yourself or the closest 8 year old.

  4. brianmpei says:

    Thanks Brad! We had some great adventures, I don’t remember you ever getting in my way though! Have you ever told mom & dad about our b&e adventures?

  5. Brad says:

    ???? b&e Are you talking about the woods behind and all they had to offer?

  6. brianmpei says:

    Indeed. I think the statute of limitations has run out!

  7. Rene says:

    I had no idea you had such a sordid past!!

    I remember your “Little Brother” in High School. He must have loved you, because he could have easily thumped you!

  8. brianmpei says:

    Indeed he could have!

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