Farm Boy: The Club, pt. 2

continued from part one which can be found here.

I followed them upstairs, all the way back to Susan’s room. He had me sit on the bed, Brad sat down beside me. Phil said, “Your final test is easy but you have to complete it or you can’t be in the club.”

“O.K. What do I have to do?”

Phil reached into a dresser drawer and he pulled out a pair of silk panties.

I gulped.

Brad’s eyes got very big. I don’t think they’d discussed this second test or maybe he was just surprised to actually see panties.

“You have to wear these,” Phil started, “but not just put them on, you’ve got to wear them for the whole rest of the day and tomorrow you’ll be in the club. You can’t say anything to anyone about it and if my mom finds out, we don’t know anything about a club.” He handed me the panties.

Today I would call them “granny panties” and I think it’s more likely they belonged to my Aunt Norma than to my cousin Susan, but if they were Susan’s I can see why she didn’t take them with her when she went to University. “I’ll do it.” I said, balling the panties up and shoving them in my pocket. I walked to the washroom at the end of the hall, closed the door, locked it and looked at myself in the mirror.

I took them out of my pocket and stared at the wad of panties in my hand. I stood there for a few minutes and finally figured no one would ever know about this. I took off my pants and slid out of my tighty whities and into the panties. They were huge and this in no way reflects on the proportions of either my cousin or my aunt. Well, of my cousin anyway. I pulled my pants back on and the tops of the panties actually spilled out over the top of my Oshkosh. I stuffed them back down inside my pants and tucked my shirt in over them.

And then I heard my Aunt’s voice calling up the stairs for us to come down for supper.

I unlocked the door and walk down the steps. I’m a tighty whities kind of guy, no boxers for me and the silky bagginess of the panties had me walking weird and feeling just a little strange. Phil and Brad were already at the table when I came down. I walked up to my chair, Uncle Keith was already seated and Aunt Norma was bringing food to the table. Phil said, “Brian, are you o.k.? You seem…different.” I shot him a look, I had hoped to get through this meal quickly and retreat to my room. As soon as he asked if I was o.k. my Aunt’s nurture radar went up and she started asking me all kinds of diagnostic questions to see if I was under the weather or hurt or feeling homesick.

“I’m fine, really, maybe just a little tired from walking the beans.” And she was willing to buy that. But Phil wasn’t done.

“No, no, there’s something different about you, hmmm, what could it be, it’s not something I can see, hmm, are you feeling different today?” Phil asked. And now Aunt Norma was sitting at the table and she and Uncle Keith were both looking at me. Nobody could eat ‘til Uncle Keith said grace and he didn’t look like he was in any hurry ‘til they got to the bottom of this. They knew something was up they just couldn’t quite figure out what it was.

Phil smiled at me. Brad grinned. I squirmed.

I went for a diversion. I started to eat.

“We haven’t said grace yet.” Uncle Keith said.

“Maybe you’re just hungry,” Aunt Norma suggested.

“Let’s pray.” Uncle Keith bowed his head and said grace and I was spared. It was the longest meal I’d ever eaten and I’d never been more aware of underwear than I was as we ate. Eventually we were excused and I went upstairs to hide out for the rest of the night. Phil and Brad came to me. “Well, you did it, can’t believe you did it, but you did, so you’re in our club.”

I took off the panties and put my tighty whities back on, then I had to figure out what to do with the panties. Eventually I smuggled them back into Susan’s room and into the dresser and escaped unseen.

In bed that night I read about Jeb Stuart and his Haunted Tank again, occasionally using my silly putty to lift a picture and stretch it to gigantic proportions. I kept thinking about being in the club. I wondered what sort of cool things our club would do and what sort of adventures were ahead of me now that I was officially a member of Phil and Brad’s club. I slept with a summer breeze blowing in one window and out the other and when I woke up to go walk the beans I forgot all about the club and we never talked about it again.


About brianmpei

Stumbling towards what comes next.
This entry was posted in Farm, Life, Meaning, Rambling, Reflective. Bookmark the permalink.

5 Responses to Farm Boy: The Club, pt. 2

  1. shelleyperry says:

    I can’t believe you just confessed to wearing girls panties on your blog! The reprecussions to this will be astronomical (and by that, i mean i will be making fun of you for the rest of my life).

  2. shellie says:

    I don’t know who this other Shelley is, but I like her already. 😀

  3. brianmpei says:

    Shelley: I don’t understand. You wear panties all the time, why would you make fun of somebody for doing something you do all the time?

    Shellie: Shelley is the older sister Nathan never had and the other daughter Donna and I never had.

  4. Patty says:

    Brian, you’re a brave soul!

  5. brianmpei says:

    Thanks Patty, I think of myself as a survivor… 😉

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