Giving Up The Bean

evil-bean.jpg I’m on day 6 of my Bean rehab. Currently I’m on the methadone equivalent of the Bean addiction: Tea. I know I’ve tried to kick the Bean before but this time I’m going to try to make it stick. I’m serious. I can honestly say that in the last 6 days of being Bean free that I feel better physically other than the wicked withdrawal. Partly it’s the way I tend to take the Bean with a double sugar, double cream suspension. It’s a little like pot with some PCP mixed in. (Um, not that I’d know that.) When I can afford the good stuff I prefer a nice dry cappuccino but the truth is I can’t afford to shop in that neighbourhood very often to get my fix. So my local dealer brews the bean most days so that it only goes down in that double double suspension. I poured the cold remains of a double double the other day and the cream and sugar syrup was half and inch thick on the bottom of the cup. I knew then it was time to go to rehab.

Some turn to the Bean socially, some purely recreationally, for some it’s a brief flirtation all about the sexiness and excitement, the rush of the bean. For me it started socially, something to hold in my hand at parties and then the next thing I knew I was getting my own equipment to mass produce my own supply at home. Now when friends want to hook up for a cup of the Bean I’ll have to get a tea before they buy for me and I stumble back into my addiction. God help me, I have people who randomly come by to see me and just bring a medium double double along for me. My love for the Bean is so well known that the people in my life know what scatches this itch!

I’m posting this because I need the accountability of community. I need a sponsor for those early mornings and I need someone to walk this road before me so I know when it might be safe to go back in to a Starbucks. I’d like to be able to enjoy the ambience without jonesing for a carmel macchiatto or getting in trouble for sniffing other people’s cups. My greatest fear is that I’ll become that guy on the street I see now and then that goes through the trash taking out the old Tim’s cups he finds there and sucking out the Bean/Cream/Sugar syrup off the bottom of the 2 day old containers. I licked my lips as I wrote that, not a good sign. I’d go to an A.A. meeting but the Bean is actually a feature there. For now I’ll just keep on keeping on and take one day at a time.

Hi, my name’s Brian and I’m a Beanaholic…

About brianmpei

Stumbling towards what comes next.
This entry was posted in coffee, Confession, Life, Rambling. Bookmark the permalink.

5 Responses to Giving Up The Bean

  1. sweetlybroken says:

    I would love to sponsor you but some would say “are you kidding me”! Buy me an espresso some time and just sit back to watch as I morph into Hammie from Over the Hedge, that’ll scare you straight back to tea.
    You can do this.

  2. brianmpei says:

    Well, I’m definitely interested in seeing that Sweetly! How about this week? Someone brought me a coffee this morning. I resisted but inhaled. A lot.

  3. Tim Stark says:

    POSSIBLE BRIGHT SIDE: there might be some increased creativity to be gained out of the caffeine sacrifice. When I do my No-Pepsi-this-month thing (any guesses which month I pick most years?), I almost always find that my dreams go all out in colors and adventures (and massive, extremely cool architecture, but that may just be me …), and my creativity (esp. for writing) kicks into high gear (after the first couple of it-would-be-easier-to-be-dead-than-to-feel-this-bad-and-energyless days).

    I hope the permanent fast you’ve chosen goes great, man!

  4. brianmpei says:

    Thanks! So far, so good. Not that I’m not cravin’…but I’m hanging in there. But I miss my bean!

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